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Heterogeneous Spectacles

The Performative Con: How We Method-Act Our Way Through the Checkout Line

There’s this thing happening, right? This raw uncut shit we’re all doing every goddamn day, playing ourselves like we’re method actors who forgot we’re acting. I’m not talking about the sanitized Broadway version of life, the stuff you package up nice for the tourists. I’m talking about the performance embedded in just being, the way I hold my cigarette or slouch at the DMV or perform “interested listener” at your tedious party.

What I’m fucking with here is fundamentally different from constructing those hermetically sealed dream boxes that pass for theatre, those Wolfgang Iser joints where you cordon off the imaginary from the actual, build a moat around fantasy land. Iser’s entire hustle is this: narrative isn’t copying reality like some third rate cover band. It’s manufacturing an imaginary space that lets us think about what we can’t otherwise access in the meat puppet world. Fiction becomes this diagnostic tool. You slam the imaginary against the empirical, watch the sparks fly, see what breaks and what doesn’t. The gap between them, that’s where the truth leaks out.

Performance art, the real shit, not the trust fund navel gazing, recognizes that everything’s already performance. It exposes the machinery, the artifice baked into so called normalcy. You follow the unwritten rules, hit your marks in the social contract, and suddenly you’re seeing how completely constructed ordinary behavior actually is.

But here’s my gig: as a theatre director, I’m hunting something else. I’m trying to understand how a culture draws the fucking line, how it says “this space here, this is where we build imaginary worlds, where the ‘as if’ takes over.” Real bodies enacting the hypothetical, usually wrestling with dense, contrary texts that mutate in performance, corrupted by actors’ tics and directorial obsessions.
That contamination, that messy collision. That’s everything to me.

Traditional American theatre? It’s ossified into high church ritual. Proscenium arch performances have become the classical music of drama: precious relics for people who’ve forgotten how to be genuinely curious, who want their entertainment pre digested and non-threatening.  And black boxes, just the chamber music version.

And pop culture performance? Don’t even get me started. Pseudo rebellion packaged and sold back to you. All these calcified conventions pretending to be transgressive while operating strictly within the permitted boundaries of carnival, that safety valve release that changes absolutely nothing.

Sure, dramatic texts are tyrannical, univocal, repressive as hell. But my gamble, what keeps me from bleading out in a bathtub, is that by demolishing the theatre’s fourth wall, creating site-specific, paratheatrical interventions,aGrotowski coined “paratheatre” for this visceral, boundary-erasing approach that obliterated the performer-spectator divide. He took this work outdoors, into Polish forests, as anti-performance events. Post-1975, he abandoned public theatre entirely, moving through Paratheatre (1969-78), Theatre of Sources (1976-1982), Objective Drama (1983-86), to Art as Vehicle (1986-present). His legacy continues at the Workcenter in Pontedera, Italy. you can crack open the text, let it breathe differently, create these charged zones of material intensity.

Obviously, just dragging shit outside doesn’t solve anything. Performers need to unlearn their training, designers need to torch their playbooks, and audiences…

References[+]

The Brutal Democracy of Making

granite lady, Collaboration and The Performance Space

You walk into rehearsal with this thing in your head: this perfect, shimmering bastard of an idea. And then reality shows up with a tire iron and starts beating the shit out of it. But here’s the thing: that’s not a bug, it’s the whole goddamn point.

I’m working with other people, right? Some of them get inside my skull in ways I didn’t invite, didn’t expect. They take what I thought was crystal clear and smash it into a thousand refractions. Site-specific work? Forget about it. You think you’re in control, you’re shaping the frame, positioning the pieces, conducting the whole symphony, and then the space itself has other ideas. Accidents cascade. Random collisions. The universe deciding to rewrite your script in real time.

The images you constructed so carefully? They start mating with each other when you’re not looking, spawning these hybrid offspring you never imagined. Actors bring their meat and chaos into the equation. Text becomes texture becomes something else entirely. It’s volatile, man. Everything you predetermined gets shredded by what you didn’t see coming: transformations that sometimes feel like betrayals, sometimes like grace.

But those collisions? Those unwelcome guests crashing your vision? They’re usually where the real magic hides. Doors open to rooms you didn’t know the building had.

When you take that private dream and drag it into the light (through conversation, through the brutal democracy of collaboration, through photographs that freeze and betray the process) it stops being yours alone. It’s a negotiation now, sometimes willing, mostly not. Your subjective hallucination meets other people’s bodies, other people’s imagination, and the whole thing evolves or dies.

The space, whether it’s some decaying monument or a stretch of industrial wasteland, isn’t just a container. It’s consciousness made architectural. A three dimensional model of how we think, how we process reality. It keeps the work from being mere mimicry, mere behavioral reproduction.

You can’t tell an actor they’re “performing a mediated image within a larger structure of consciousness.” That’s the kind of art speak bullshit that empties rooms. But you can understand that the human figure onstage isn’t raw data. It’s already been processed, filtered through awareness, transformed into something beyond simple perception.

I know I can’t control how anyone receives this. That’s the surrender you make. But I can shape it as something already mediated, already worked over by consciousness, and that creates a different kind of electric charge for whoever’s watching.

The performance unfolds in space, sure, but more crucially as space itself: like a vision that grabs your skull and won’t let go, that constitutes itself as a series of images reshaping how you see in that moment. Each person in the audience negotiates their own treaty with what they’re experiencing.

It’s phenomenological as hell, this whole process. Visual and acoustic images colliding with individual consciousness, each spectator processing the wreckage in their own way. The beautiful, inevitable wreckage of making something real.

a process of vital divergence

Speculation during a Balcony rehearsal. Ryan Tacata as Carmen during a rehearsal for Jean Genet’s The Balcony at the Old Mint.

Ryan Tacata, Jean Genet, Jean Genet The Balcony, Theater Rehearsal, The Old Mint, San Francisco theatre, theatre photography, theatre documentation, theater bay area
Theatre is a process of vital divergence from everyday life: it does not simply reflect the everyday but as with the simplest pedestrian dance diversifies its habitual patterns and opens its place of occurrence to the imagination.
Alan Read, Theatre and Everyday Life, 1993

Balcony Rehearsal at The Old Mint

anticipation/calculation/presumption

while Post-structuralism exhausted itself
as a aesthetic/analytic strategy
its premises continue to resonate
Derrida’s removal of the idiosyncratic writer
as a stable object of study
as the premise on which
I would read a series of texts
may seem too cold for those
who find it difficult to read dramatic works
outside the notion of a textual series
set apart from other texts
through an idea of authorship my hypothetical reconstruction of playwright/subject
grows even more problematic

I recognize my need
or maybe it’s just a desire…
to construct an idea of an author
but this project seems
hypothetical
transitive
complicit in the dynamics of ideology

I can easily identify
the irreconcilable differences among
Coleridge’s Shakespeare
Bradley’s Shakespeare
Wilson Knight’s Shakespeare
Arthur Harbage’s Shakespeare
Stephen Greenblatt’s Shakespeare
or Sartre’s Genet
Bernard Frechtman’s Genet
Edmund White’s Genet

I understand each of these Shakespeares
each of these Genets
is inextricably implicated
in one of a series of present moments
in which an aesthetic premise
provided the method of authorial construction

even the collision of the unconscious
Derrida’s chance
and the predetermination of codified systems
constitutes a model of author
in its image of that aspect of the psyche
that is either most free
(of rational control)
or most bound
(to the accidents of unconscious determination)
coming into contact
with the externally given structures of language

my reluctance
to leave the post-structural game of displacing the subject
is Derrida’s fault
Derridean instability
offers an attractive model
in my thinking about the rehearsal process

as I prepare for a future performance
I enjoy
(as well as fear)
the instability of the process
where I can offer or accept
almost any interpretative act
as a possibility for a moment

what is least pleasurable for me
is that moment
where I trade that instability
for the relative permanence of a fixed point of interpretation
that moment
at which I begin the process of constructing a performance
defining the parameters of a site
limiting the play
the freedom of the actors
and myself

at this point
as artists
we cease playing

initiating a series of repetitions
in order to write the selected rhythms
tempos
movements
and inflections
into the space, the actors and the musicians
that I
as director
think most satisfactory

this is the moment when I am most self-conscious
about inscribing “myself” into the performance
through imposing limits on others
appropriating the work to my own purposes
and foregrounding myself as an authority

this discomfort
occasioned by my knowledge
of the arbitrariness of interpretation as an activity
often provokes me
to de-stabilize the performance structurally
foregrounding
for a spectator
the idea of the event as a performance
just a “take” on the text
not a definitive “reading” of the text

on the other hand
I am equally discomfited
by the inability of an audience
a colleague
a friend
a mentor
to recognize the
“validity”
“timeliness”
“perceptiveness”
“originality”
even “veracity”
of my “take”

I am like Malvolio’s perception of the “boy” Cesario
within “standing water, between boy and man”
caught at that moment between a changing tide

I apprehend the possibility
of a reconstitution of the subject
yet I wear my sense of myself and the playwright
as reconstituted subjects
somewhat in the way
the boy actor In the original productions of this play a male actor played Viola: a female character who disguises herself as a man wears the male clothes provided to Viola

as I dress myself in the related concepts of an authorial
and an interpretating subject
I am putting on a costume
with which I am naturally familiar
in my non-theoretical/academic
modes of speaking and thinking

these are the clothes I wear off-stage

yet
to fulfill the game of the performance
I must not wear these clothes with an apparent ease and naturalness
but rather inhabit the garments as though they belonged to the opposite
the sexual other

and yet
within the game itself
I find alignments between role and self
that make the “alien” quality of the stage costume
seem precisely that
unnatural
an arbitrary and temporary disguise
not the familiar dress that the irony of the convention calls for

I find a third sex
an androgyny that makes either role, Viola or Cesario
seem to be a construct formed for the relational structure
that the conventions of comedy demand

somewhere in the movement between Viola and Cesario
that moment in between childhood and adulthood
I’ve lost my confidence in what that maturity may be
if it will be more authentic
than the ambiguous role this performance elicits

anticipation calculation presumption
in performance

Dance With Rapture

We ought to dance with rapture that we should be alive and in the flesh, and part of the living, incarnate cosmos. I am part of the sun as my eye is part of me. That I am part of the earth my feet know perfectly, and my blood is part of the sea. My soul knows that I am part of the human race, my soul is an organic part of the great human soul, as my spirit is part of my nation. In my own very self, I am part of my family. There is nothing of me that is alone and absolute except my mind, and we shall find that the mind has no existence by itself, it is only the glitter of the sun on the surface of the waters.
D.H. Lawrence,  
Apocalypse and the Writings on Revelation

Briana Dickinson, dance, performance, dancer, movement

Here’s something in Berkeley, in a studio that smells like old wood and somebody’s ambition. Light coming through those tall windows the way it does in Northern California, unforgiving, honest, showing every line and shadow.

Briana moves and gone somewhere else entirely. That’s the thing about dancers, they leave. Not physically, but in every other way that matters. One moment she’s adjusting her shoe, human, self-conscious. The next, she’s transformed into something I can’t quite name.

I’ve spent a lot of time watching people work. Musicians, artists, hustlers on street corners performing card tricks for rent money. There’s a particular intensity when someone is completely consumed by their craft. No pretense. No safety net. Just the raw act of creation, which is also an act of faith—faith that this moment matters, that this movement means something.

The studio floor creaks. She spins and I shoot.

Click.

Pause.

Again.

It’s not collaboration exactly, I’m a parasite, really, feeding off her energy, trying to steal pieces of something ephemeral and pin it to paper. She’s generous about it, lets me lurk in the margins of her process.

Between takes, she’s quiet. I’m quiet. That’s fine. We’re both doing the same thing in different ways, trying to make sense of being alive by making something that proves we were here. That we felt something. That we moved through space with intention.

The afternoon stretches out. The light changes. She keeps dancing. I keep shooting.
Outside, Berkeley goes on being Berkeley, bookstores and coffee shops and earnest conversations about changing the world. In here, it’s simpler. Motion. Light. The shutter’s mechanical click.

Proof of life.

Sailing The Storm

Faeries, come take me out of this dull world,
For I would ride with you upon the wind,
Run on the top of the dishevelled tide,
And dance upon the mountains like a flame.
W.B. Yeats, The Land of Heart’s Desire

sailing the storm

Rocinante: Sailing the storm outside the Golden Gate Bridge.

Listen, I get it. I fucking GET it.

Here’s some romantic fool naming his sailboat after Don Quixote’s broken-down nag, pointing it straight at a storm outside the Golden Gate like that’s going to mean something. Like the Pacific gives a shit about my Yeats quote or my need for poetry-in-motion or whatever existential itch I’m trying to scratch by scaring myself half to death.

And you know what? Good. GOOD. Because the alternative is what, exactly? Sitting in a climate-controlled box, scrolling through other people’s approximations of living, convincing myself that’s the same thing as actually feeling the universe try to kill me a little bit?

That Yeats line, “take me out of this dull world”, that’s the whole ballgame right there. The dullness isn’t comfort, it’s death. It’s the slow suffocation of doing what I’m supposed to, wanting what I’m supposed to want, feeling what I’m supposed to feel. And somewhere along the way I forgot that being human means occasionally putting myself in the path of something so much bigger than me that it reminds me I’m not the center of the goddamn universe.

The storm doesn’t care about my artistic practice or my Instagram likes or my carefully constructed narrative about seeking adventure. The storm is honest in a way nothing else is anymore. It’ll throw me around, test every decision I made about rigging and ballast and whether I actually know what the hell I’m doing, and maybe, MAYBE, if I’m lucky and the universe is feeling generous, I come out the other side with my boat still floating and my hands raw and my heart actually beating for real instead of just keeping time.

This is the same beautiful stupid human reflex that says “I want to FEEL something, even if, especially if, it hurts.”

The dull world is always there, waiting. Bills and obligations and reasonable decisions. But every now and then you need to dance upon the mountains like a flame, even if you’re just some idiot in a small boat testing my mortality against indifferent weather patterns. That’s not crazy. What’s crazy is thinking comfort is the same as being alive.

Hyde Street Pier

Hydes Street Pier

It is not upon you alone the dark patches fall,
The dark threw its patches down upon me also,
The best I had done seem’d to me blank and suspicious,
My great thoughts as I supposed them, were they not in reality meagre?
Nor is it you alone who know what it is to be evil,
I am he who knew what it was to be evil,
I too knitted the old knot of contrariety,
Blabb’d, blush’d, resented, lied, stole, grudg’d,
Had guile, anger, lust, hot wishes I dared not speak,
Was wayward, vain, greedy, shallow, sly, cowardly, malignant,
The wolf, the snake, the hog, not wanting in me,
The cheating look, the frivolous word, the adulterous wish, not wanting,
Refusals, hates, postponements, meanness, laziness, none of these wanting,
Was one with the rest, the days and haps of the rest,
Was call’d by my nighest name by clear loud voices of young men as they saw me approaching or passing,
Felt their arms on my neck as I stood, or the negligent leaning of their flesh against me as I sat,
Saw many I loved in the street or ferry-boat or public assembly, yet never told them a word,
Lived the same life with the rest, the same old laughing, gnawing, sleeping,

Play’d the part that still looks back on the actor or actress,
The same old role, the role that is what we make it, as great as we like,
Or as small as we like, or both great and small.
Walt Whitman, Crossing Brooklyn Ferry

Hyde Street Pier

We Are Being Carried Somewhere

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

My belief assumed a form that it commonly assumes among the educated people of our time. This belief was expressed by the word “progress.” At the time it seemed to me that this word had meaning. Like any living individual, I was tormented by questions of how to live better. I still had not understood that in answering that one must live according to progress, I was talking just like a person being carried along in a boat by the waves and the wind; without really answering, such a person replies to the only important question-“Where are we to steer?”-by saying, “We are being carried somewhere.”
Leo Tolstoy, A Confession

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

So I’m on this old schooner with my camera, and I can smell the salt and diesel and century-old wood, and my hands are burning from helping haul lines because I can’t just stand there like some tourist with a viewfinder, I’m either crew or I’m cargo, and I didn’t come out here to be cargo.

Alma, San Francisco Maritime, Sailor

That Tolstoy quote isn’t some clever frame for pretty pictures. It’s the whole GODDAMN POINT. We’re all out here asking “where should we steer?” while the tide’s already made every decision for us, while progress, that beautiful meaningless word we use to avoid admitting we have no idea what we’re doing, carries us somewhere we pretend to have chosen.

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

But here’s what happens when I stop asking: I pull the rope. The bridge passes overhead like some massive rust-orange metaphor we’ve all forgotten how to decode. The light hits the water just so. And for maybe thirty seconds I’m not worried about meaning or direction or any of that real world NOISE, I’m just there, meat, body in the wind, doing the thing in front of me, feeling the wood creak and the canvas snap and the bay trying to carry us out past the Gate.

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

These aren’t just photographs. This is what REALNESS looks like when I stop fighting the current.
When I stop trying to be captain and just let yourself be crew for once.

Alma, San Francisco Maritime, schooner, national park, golden gate bridge, san francisco, sailing, sf maritime

The Schooner Alma (San Francisco Maritime National Park)
on her way to Kirby Cove

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

 

 

 

 

 

 

Alma, San Francisco Maritime

Franconia Performance Salon #12

A learned fool is more a fool than an ignorant fool.
Molière

So here’s the thing about watching someone saw a table in half at what amounts to an art salon in someone’s basement or warehouse or wherever the hell these things happen anymore: it’s the most honest thing you’re gonna see all night. None of this precious bullshit, none of the “let me explain my process” hand-wringing. Just: here’s a table. Watch me destroy it. The violence is the point, the sweat is the point, the doing is the point.

Green Tooth Girl, Performance Art San Francisco, photography

Richie Rhombus, Franconia Performance Salon #12, performance art, san francisco

Nathalie Brilliant, Franconia Performance Salon #12, Performance Art, San FranciscoAngrette McCloskey, Performance Art, Stanford TAPS, San Francisco, photography

Angrette McCloskey, Performance Art, San Francisco, photography

My snail film I showed, and fuck me, the hubris of thinking I can direct gastropods, that’s the kind of beautiful failure that keeps this whole thing from calcifying into another dead scene. I tried something genuinely deranged. It didn’t work. The snails didn’t give a shit about Conrad or Orson Welles or my vision. They moved at their own pace, left their own trails, fucked up my whole symbolic structure. That’s not failure, that’s collaboration with chaos, which is the only kind worth having.

Richie Rhombus doing his thing, fine, great, we need our reliable practitioners, the ones who show up and deliver. That’s the backbone. But I don’t remember the backbone. I remember when Angrette picked up that saw.

And it ended early. Of course it ended early. What does that tell you? It tells you that someone’s energy ran out, or people had church in the morning, or a thousand other mundane reasons that art happens in the cracks of regular life and not in some hermetically sealed cathedral of pure expression. It tells you this stuff is fragile and human and not particularly sustainable, which is exactly why it matters when it happens at all.

Franconia Performance Salon #12

Showings by by the Brilliant sisters (Nathalie and Breille), Richie Rhombus, Green Tooth Girl, Angrette McCloskey, Niki Ulehla, and Jamie Lyons.

The Relentless Now

Durational performance art is the kind of thing that makes most people want to check their phones after ninety seconds, and that’s precisely the fucking point.

We live in a world built on the three-minute song, the fifteen-second clip, the swipe-left mentality. Everything’s pre-chewed, pre-digested, designed to go down easy. But then some lunatic decides they’re going to sit in a chair for 736 hours, or live in a cage, or let people cut their clothes off with scissors, and suddenly you’re confronted with something that refuses to be consumed. It just sits there, existing, demanding that you reckon with it on its own terms or fuck off entirely.

And most people fuck off. That’s fine. That’s honest.

But the ones who stay, man, something happens. Time starts doing this weird thing where it stops being linear and becomes this thick, almost physical presence. You become aware of your own breathing. Your own body. The fact that you’re trapped in this meat-suit just like the performer, watching someone push against the same existential walls you’re pretending don’t exist.

The art establishment loves to make this stuff seem precious and theoretical, wrap it in academic language until it’s suffocated under ten pounds of discourse. But strip all that away and durational work is brutally simple: it’s about being present in a world that’s engineered for distraction. It’s a middle finger to efficiency, productivity, the notion that everything needs to justify its existence by being useful or entertaining or Instagram-ready.

Raegan Truax, Citation, Stanford University, Stanford Theater and Performance Studies, Stanford ArtsRaegan Truax, performance art, duration, stanford, artist, Stanford Theater and Performance Studies, Stanford TAPS, Stanford ArtsMemorial Auditorium, Raegan Truax, Citation, Stanford University, Stanford Theater and Performance Studies, Stanford Arts, performance art, durational art

Think about it: we’ve commodified every goddamn second of human experience. But what happens when someone just… refuses? When they say, “I’m going to do this one thing, this uncomfortable, pointless, excruciating thing, and I’m going to do it until time itself becomes strange”? That’s not passivity. That’s resistance.

Sure, some of it’s self-indulgent garbage. Some of these artists are just torturing themselves and calling it transcendence. But the real ones, the ones who understand that the medium isn’t their body but time itself, human attention, the unbearable weight of consciousness, they’re doing something that cuts through all our carefully constructed defenses. They’re saying: you can’t scroll past mortality. You can’t fast-forward through suffering. You can’t skip to the good part because there is no good part. There’s just the relentless, grinding now.

And yeah, it’s pretentious. Yeah, it’s often boring as hell. But it’s also the most honest art form we’ve got. No tricks, no editing, no hiding. Just a human being, enduring. Which is basically what we’re all doing anyway, except they’ve got the guts to make you watch.

The question isn’t whether durational performance art matters. The question is whether you’ve got the stomach to sit still long enough to find out.

 

Raegan Truax: Citation performed in Memorial Auditorium, Stanford University for the Department of Theater and Performance Studies

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